Archive for April 15th, 2009

It always seems that my life plays out like a never-ending romance comedy, you know, like the ones Drew Barrymore always play in—at least I’d like to think it does.  Perhaps I’m too dramatic.

Why is it that when we let go of something, or try to, rather, we can’t seem to truly and honestly completely let go of it… especially if that something used to be a huge part of us?

What if that something isn’t a “thing,” at all, but a person?

It just seems that lately a lot of my time has been spent trying to maintain friendships with everyone around me before we all move our separate directions when the semester ends.  It seems that something keeps haunting me…

…those little, “What if?” questions seem to always flutter around in my mind.

No, I have no regret nor will I ever for how I’ve lived my life.  Sure, I’ve made a lot of mistakes, but I don’t regret them.  Mistakes are just tender learning moments in our lives that we can look back on and hope to God that our children and grandchildren (and great grandchildren if we live that long) will never find out about them.  We find elderly people to be wise for a reason—has your grandparent ever once told you about getting drunk that one night or totaling their first car?  Not unless they’re teaching you something, and they need credibility to prove that they know what they’re talking about.

But then, those little “What if?” thoughts in my mind go away when I’m comfortable with myself and accept things for the way they are.  I know things will never be the way they used to be, and I’m OK with that.  Really, I am.  Some things are meant to be, and others are like fireworks; they quickly fly up in a spectacle in the sky, light up for a short while, then gradually dim and fall back to the Earth as we all watch from below.

Some things become nostalgic memories we’re fond to look back on and cherish, but we know that our lives can never be the same again.

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